my little sister sleeps with a box of cheez-its next to her pillow and i always thought it was because she’s lazy and likes to have it for convenient snacking but last night she told me it’s because she likes seeing it first thing when she wakes up to remind her there’s good in the world
imagine if we had text post signatures
don’t tell me to calm down I’ll throw a fucking desk at your face
My dad and I were in a hotel and he tried the coffee and smiled and said “ahh, it’s like making love in a canoe.” and I said, “it’s that good?” and he stopped smiling and looked me in the eye and said, “no, it’s fucking close to water" before pouring it down the drain really dramatically and walking away.
Oh my GOD.
Extreme dad jokes.
but do you know what makes louis even cuter
How to Turn All Your Essays into Feminist Rants No Matter the Subject Matter: An Autobiography by Me.